


A Thousand Years

by magicbunny



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: AU, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-22
Updated: 2014-02-22
Packaged: 2018-01-13 10:16:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1222525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicbunny/pseuds/magicbunny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For a thousand years it's endless heartache. When will it ever change?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Thousand Years

**Author's Note:**

> posted on my tumblr too.. XD  
> .. you'll find a banner there  
> LarryStylinsonsdaughter

Louis' P.O.V.

          Feathery brown fringes, seemingly windswept, cerulean blue eyes, tan skin... Any way I look at the mirror I could only see the same me. Every time this happens I look the same 21 years old me. I always look the same but dressed differently, to fit in, I always tell myself. Ten times I've been resurrected, nine times I've failed. Sometimes I think it's too unfair because ten days is too short but then I think about it. I'm not supposed to be alive, I'm cheating death. I'm cheating the world as it revolves and time runs the same pace, I skip time. I don't age. A hundred years and I'm 21 again for ten days then another hundred the same cycle. Sometimes I think I'm getting tired of it all, but then I remember the sole reason of this recurring event. Just a thought of him could make every single thing worth it. If he would just fall for me this time then things would finally be perfect. Everything is for him. I gave myself a fist pump and an encouraging smile as I pulled on my braces after neating over my stripe shirt. I studied myself for a bit more. I look quite decent, I guess. What caused me to flinch a bit is the hot red trousers I'm wearing. Red? Really? I turned to check the fitting. I felt myself smirk as I see how the tightness compliments my asset. After raking down my outfit, stopping to my feet to check if I'm wearing the right things and discovering I'm not wearing any socks, I pulled myself together. Whether this is the trend or not, how would I know? I haven't been alive in this year for long.

          The thing I've learned, once I get out of that door I must act accustomed. I took a breather before turning the all too familiar knob then silence took over. It's completely deafening. The absence of human chatter compensated by turning of pages isn't too advisable for healthy mental condition. It seems like the same library, but different at the same time. Time, crap I don't have time to waste. The moment I opened my eyes the clock started ticking so I gotta move. I walked along the aisle, not really knowing where to go. I just let myself to be guided by my feet. My eyes wonder around not for a book but for a certain someone. If I'm lucky this time he might be in this area right now. Then, at the classics corner my eyes were caught. Maybe I'm truly lucky this time. Once it took me three days just finding him but now within the span of less than an hour, I found him. Chocolate curls decorating his head voluminously. His green emeralds intently burning every word on the book he's holding. I'm starting to feel it, that same pounding in my chest, that twisting in my stomach. The need to get close, the need to talk to him, the need to be with him is so strong that it willed my feet to stride towards him without a plan. I stood beside him observing every little thing that I see changed. Physical-wise there's not much to notice. He's the same beautiful man he's always been. I did expect this, what I really want to know is how he is now personality-wise. I gulp the straining lump in my throat. I need to speak, say something

"Umhh..." that's all the sound it took to get his attention in this quiet room. I could see the line of irritation on his forehead and I braced myself for a bad start, this wouldn't be the first time, I've seen a grumpy curly before anyway. But when we finally met gaze, I saw his expression changed. He lightened up as if recognizing an old acquaintance. Does he recognise me? But that's impossible. Unlike me he'd gone through the whole process of rebirth, not simply resurrection. He's supposed to have no recollection of his past life.

"Ah...." I want to hit myself for being stupid speechless. But I know I can't help it. This has always been his effect on me. No matter how many first meet we have, he'll always make my knees week and my tongue useless. Suddenly a grin spread on his face, lighting up my world when I'm about to collapse in the presence of his perfection.

"Hi" I croak out, another mistake.

          I feel the heat creeping up on my face. This is totally embarrassing. What am I doing? If he finds my action weird, he didn't show it. His eyes travelled down and his beam was bigger than before

"'The notebook' I thought people our age preferred the movie. It's nice to know someone wants to appreciate it in its written form."

          He spoke for the first time with his hypnotizing, raspy voice. I looked down at my hands. The book I randomly grabbed on my way to his table caught his attention; luck must really be in sympathy that it's finding way for me to have a bigger chance with him.

"Yeah" is all my quiet response.

          I heard him chuckle. The adorable chime of his laughter that he's trying to suppress

"You're not so much for words, are you... umh....."

          I know that tone, I used it once to get his name, so I smiled and responded accordingly

"Louis. Louis William Tomlinson"

          I offered him a handshake which he took with promising enthusiasm. His hold was firm but I could feel the warm gentleness. He doesn't have the calluses he had when I met him as a farmer but his hands weren’t soft as when he was a prince. But his warmth was the same. The warmth that he gives off that just spreads throughout my body.

"I'm Harry, Harry Edward Styles. I like your name by the way. It sounds pretty familiar" he said with a laugh.

          Maybe he does have fragments of memories at the back of his mind.

"Well Louis is quite common, don't you agree?" I defended to not let his mind wonder if we ever met before. Thankfully he shook the subject away almost instantly. It's true that I never succeeded in making him say he love me in ten days but when we meet we always gravitate inevitably. So keeping in touch with him after our meeting isn't that big of an issue.

          After our introduction at the library he asked me if I'd like to grab some coffee, being me I said I'd have tea instead. He borrowed some books out and I said I forgot my card so he borrowed 'The Notebook' in my behalf, that there is my ticket to getting together with him after today. It's always like this, the light chat after the heart-pounding intro. It's always smooth sailing at this part. The thing is we become close friends, just friends, best friends the most. He never loved me the same way I do to him but I can't force him to feel the same. All I could do is show him how I feel and hope he feels it in him.

          We've been going out since the day we met, going out as in hanging out. I said I'm new in town and I need some tour around, he gladly took the responsibility. Day by day I just fall for him harder. His smile is the best thing I see on my every waking moment, the thing I wait for. Out of all the Harry Styles I met in my thousand years, this one is the most alike to the very first Harry I fell in love with, which just makes my will stronger. At the seventh day I decided it's time for me to confess.

          On our way to the library, where we always meet and part ways on a daily basis, I told him

"I love you"

          It was sudden, I know. I surprised him, that's quite evident. He halts walking and I noticed his shoulders went rigid. I started to reach out but he cast his head down. I've acquainted with rejection quite closely, for so many times that I've come to recognize it pre datedly, so instead I ran away. I went to the bridge. No I won't jump off. I don't need to. I'd fade away soon anyway. I've died nine times, tenth is the moment I got his response awhile ago. I just need to look at the water, the same water I've looked at every time. I stood there looking far ahead, clutching so hard at the railing I knew my knuckles went white. No matter how many times I get rejected, I can't get used to the pain. Each one is a fresh cut. My heart isn't numb yet. I still can't will my eyes to hold back the tears. I knew any moment now I'll feel the familiar warm wetness on my cheeks. No matter how hard I try, why can't he love me back? Even just once. I've loved him for a thousand years. Another hundred years and I'd have to go through this rejection again. When will it stop? I clutch at my chest wishing for the clenching to stop squeezing my heart. When I think all my tears have fallen I don't have anything to give anymore, I walked back to the library. At the footstep of the closed entryway, there he was, sitting at the steps. But he immediately shoots up at the sight of me. It's his turn to stun me. What's he doing here? Shouldn't he be home now? His eyes were glistening and I know mine were red-rimmed so I averted my gaze. We kept our safe distance with the rustle of the wind to keep our ears in tuned. I want to ask him why but I knew my voice would sound raw from crying. I don't want to make it more obvious than it already is. I thought we'd stand there like that for the rest of the night but then he spoke with all the wariness I didn't know he'll have for me after the 'little' situation we had earlier.

"Why'd you run?" Those were his words.

          I almost let out a bitter laughter. He's asking about me running, why isn't he questioning me about what I said? But instead I bit it back and just shook my head. I intended to walk past him with nothing else. I accept it. It's another failure, another hundred years. Maybe I’ll never get him. Maybe I was never given chances but punishment, punishment of never ending heart break for I have loved a man. Before I get past him he spoke again, his tone almost frightened and uncertain.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" it was a question and it's just right.

          I just bowed my head and went in. I know this, he wants to keep the friendship, but that wouldn't make me stay. Unless he says he loves me and means it the right way I'll vanish on the tenth day inevitably. So it's better to end it like this, saving us the sweat, the awkwardness and explanations. Keep it short, keep it painless; fast kill. Now I just have to wait for the tenth day locked up in the secret room at the library, and that I did. On the tenth day though I decided to get a last glance of this era, I walked through isles and isles of new and old books. Some I think I've seen before, some of this books witnessed how I was rejected. There was a time Harry didn't broke it to me gently. He loathed me. Never have he ever hurt me physically but the blows he gave me are much more painful. He said he hates me for ruining what we had for some petty ideas. He thought me falling in love with him is silly, the hell with that! There is this other time, the one I'll never ever forget. The time he spat words I never expected him to say to me. Then he left with nothing but rage and disgust in his jade eyes. I never want to meet another Harry as heartless as that one ever again. I touched the leather of the book I read the last time I was here. I just know it's the same book I read a hundred years ago. I smiled sullenly, it's amazing how long it lasted, but would it be here the next time. Everything wear off, would my love for him do too? Everything end, will my misery do too? I neared the door to get a glance outside, but what I saw is something, or someone I wouldn't want to see on my last hours here. I want to turn away but I see his unsettled expression and somehow I felt like calling for him. I held the urge back and instead tried to drag my feet to hide in the room. Yes, I'll hide because I'm a coward. But then he caught my eyes and he hastily ran towards me. I froze because of the longing I saw. His relief was puzzling and surprising. He enveloped me in his arms, muttering

"I thought I'll never find you again"

          He let go and towered me. Lines of irritation began showing on his forehead as he started somewhat scolding me.

"I thought we agreed to meet the other day? I waited for you! What happened?"

          He's annoyed and worried at the same time

"I waited for the whole day and I looked for you the past few days but you never showed up till now."

          That made me chuckle a bit

"You just waited for a day, I've been waiting for a thousand years...." then he looked at me funny. I shook my head dismissively, playing my words as joke "......I'm leaving today though, so I guess this is goodbye."

          Surprise surprise, I just can't help not bidding my farewell to the man I have loved for all my life.

"But I thought you said you love me"

          I looked into his eyes, they were clear and round and they are starting to water with his mouth threatening to quiver.

"I do, but it's one sided so it doesn't matter."

"It does because I love you too!" Harry whined like a little kid.

          I kept my smile for him

"You don't love me like I do to you, you don't understand"

"I do! You don't have to leave. I love you!" He insists

          He's much like a kid, at age of eighteen maybe he's really still a kid. He shut his eyes so tight as if suppressing tears.

"If you are only saying that for me to stay it'll be of no use, believe me."

          I don't want to gain hope from words thoroughly filled with his eager wish of making me stay. I'm just telling him the truth. He stared me straight in the eyeball, determination clearer than ever.

"I mean it" and in that briefest of moment I saw him as a real, grown up man.

          I do want to believe him, I really do.

"If that's true, then let's meet here tomorrow"

          Tomorrow we'll know if he does mean it. I turned and walk away with still that smile. I'm not hoping but I do want to believe him. I won't blame him if I vanish, he's young he could be mistaken. But I'm quite contented. For the first time I heard those words leave his lips.

_"I love you"_ so he says

 

**Fin**


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